'Should I be concerned?': Worker confronts HR representative after their manager bans employees from discussing pay

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Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Dec 29, 2023 2:00 PM EST

There are some things that coworkers shouldn't ask each other about. It's usually a good rule of thumb not to discuss politics, religion, or s*x too thoroughly with the people you have to spend 40 hours a week with. Heck, I don't even want to know the in-depth political compass of someone I only spend 10 hours a week with. After all, you're not there to make friends. You're there to be America's Next Top Marketing and Communications Representative. 

While knowing those details about your coworkers probably won't do you much good, there is another forbidden conversation that can actually help employees progress in their careers. Finding out how much money your coworkers make could, at its worst, breed resentment. At its best, it can empower workers to ask for the money that they deserve. One worker was told by their manager that discussing these matters is not allowed, so they took it straight to HR. 

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  • 01
    r/antiwork u/iicecream_. 22h Should I be concerned?
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  • 02
    2 Messages Inbox Concern About Office Pol... ^ Hello I hope you're having a good day. I spoke with earlier today about an office policy I had a concern with here at Following some mutual conversations about pay between employees the other day, my store manager spoke to me about employees not being allowed to discuss their pay with each other, telling me to keep my pay discreet and hidden. This is concerning to me considering discussing pay amongst employees is within our rights and to create a v
    via u/iicecream_
  • 03
    < Inbox W 3:26 Hi 2 Messages ... RE: Concern About Office Policy Thank you 77 3:08 PM We do recommend that employees not share their personal pay information, as some employees may be in the same position but different rates due to experience etc and can make it uncomfortable. Please let me know if you have any further questions. If you choose to discuss that would be at your own decision.
    via u/iicecream_
  • 04
    I sent an email to our HR rep because our manager said we shouldn't be talking about our wages with each other and this is the response I received after 5 days of waiting.
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  • 05
    Chris_the_Otter • 22h "We don't like it when you share but we can't tell you that you can't do it." 46k ... Reply
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  • 06
    1singleduck 21h ● "So am i allowed to?" "We highly recommend you don't." "But you're not explicitly prohibiting it?" "Let's just say that it might have the potential for harm, but it also might not." "Am i, or am i not, accoring to the policies of the company, allowed to discuss my pay with my coworkers?" "Yesn't." : ... 44.1k ↓
    via u/1singleduck
  • 07
    LittlestEcho • 19h (edit this) Recently learned a returning hire was making more than me before he left a 2nd time. I've been there 9 years. He was there for 1 year and returned for another year before moving on again. Oh boy, should've seen the absolute rage to be had when we learned new hires were making more than existing workers. 4 dollars MORE to be exact. People threatened to walk out in droves. Immediate raises were given to all so we were all making a dollar or two more than the new hire
    via u/LittlestEcho
  • 08
    Magenta Logistic • 18h Communist Immediate raises were given to all so we were all making a dollar or two more than the new hires. This is why they don't want us discussing pay. ... 1.4k
    via u/Magenta_Logistic
  • 09
    Its Got To MakeSense • 21h That's corporate speak for "We don't want to break the law but would rather you don't do this" They're covering their have any repercussions, internal politics . As for whether this will that all depends on your Reply 41.2k
    via u/ItsGotMakeSense
  • 10
    R50cent 19h ● Yea... OP is gonna get let go 'for performance issues' ... 4293 ↓
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  • 11
    P_K148 • 21h Save the emails just in case, but that was a pretty decent response from HR. They likely informed the manager that he can't forbid employees from discussing pay then sent that email. As HR, they did what was expected of them by taking the managers side (saying that it was frowned upon) while protecting the company legally by expressly stating that it is allowed and that the company isn't going against labor laws. Reply 4 1.5k ↓
    via u/P_K148
  • 12
    Sir_Oshi 21h Yeah basically this. The HR rep is basically saying 'We can't punish you for doing this but realize that discussing your pay could cause hard feelings among your coworkers' That said, assuming you're in a Right to Work state, I would be worried about them construing any angst arising from pay gaps being aired as a hostile work environment, caused by you. Or some other nit picky unrelated thing. Companies are more than willing to find 'justified' reasons for firing someone in situati
    via u/Sir_Oshi
  • 13
    captainzigzag • 21h HR is not on your side. They've now flagged you as a troublemaker. .... Reply 268
    via u/captainzigzag
  • 14
    NotHis RealName • 21h ● Genuine question and I'm not being snarky: What exactly did you expect their answer to be? Reply 4289
    via u/NotHisRealName
  • 15
    RandyGrey ● 21h It doesn't matter what their answer is, only that they put it in writing. Either they officially endorse an illegal policy, or they use corporate speak to say they don't like when you do it, and then you can just go right ahead and ignore them. ... 4213
    via u/RandyGrey

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management salary antiwork toxic-manager employee hr manager work coworkers employer employees pay human resources managers payment money
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